My daughter’s alien
For a limited time only, if you will send me evidence of having purchased a copy of “The Bureau of Resurrection”, I will send you a crocheted alien, handcrafted by my daughter (free of charge). (You can send evidence to my email address: zeissel@gmail.com, or to my home address at: 701 Hartwood, Stillwater, OK 74075.) Be sure to include your address.
Hurry, before the government finds them!
If you would like to see more of my daughter’s crocheted items go to:
www.flickr.com/photos/eebrs/
The planet may be destroyed if you do not buy my book. To save the planet and make you laugh until Romulan ale spews from your nose, I am promoting my newly published science fiction comedy, “The Bureau of Resurrection”.
Seriously, this book is one of two warnings from the “Official Manual for the Lawful Resurrection of Human Beings”. (The other warning is not to operate heavy machinery while being resurrected.)
In the future, people are re-born every so often to keep them physically young. The problem is that their minds age. (Which makes them want to wear their pants too high and move to Florida.) Our hero is employed to rejuvenate their minds. But bad things happen when he electronically subtracts their sins. This evil finds a home. However, our hero gets help from a woman who looks like Snow White, an unstable genius, and a man who can’t decide if he is Ensign Sulu, or a clock.
This web site has a forum. If you are interested, go to: http://bureauofresurrection.com/forum You can purchase the book by going to the web site below. Then just add Romulan ale (mik will work too).
CreateSpace.com/3330562
The author, before he shaved
I grew up in Farmington, New Mexico where I did a lot of fishing and camping, and some pyromania.
I am married to his best friend, Jeannie. We have three grown children and five grandchildren.
I am an Associate Professor of Microbiology and Molecular Genetics at Oklahoma State University, and like to spend my sabbaticals in Australia and New Zealand.
I now keep my pyromania in check, except on New Years Eve when I blow up gingerbread houses with my friends.
If you would like to see some of my science essays (non-fiction), see my other web site:
http://immunoman.com
Douglas Adams is one of my favorite authors. I tried to make “The Bureau of Resurrection” a science fiction comedy in that vein. Much of the zany humor comes from making fun of classic sci fi books and movies. The following is an example of a portion of the book that parodies the “Planet of the Apes” and “King Kong”:
“New York City was replaced by Oooooga City. In gorilla language, oooooga roughly translates as “a whole lot o’ shakin’”. But people outside of Oooooga City often refer to it as “the big banana” or “the city of the oops”. Deer were not the first animals to be given higher intelligence. Gorillas were brought into New York to perform manual labor and to sell hot dogs to Buddhist monks who needed primates to make them one with everything. Later, the gorillas were made smarter so that they could work in the plants and factories. However, once they received a very slight increase in intelligence and learned to speak broken English, they became excellent lawyers. It seems what they lacked in literacy, they more than made up for in “courtroom presence”.
The gorillas also excelled in politics and broadcast journalism for similar reasons. However, gorillas never did take over Wall Street because intelligence-enhanced Orangutans had better heads for numbers and better financial instincts in general.
By and by, the combined OrangutanGorilla Alliance (OG) took control of local politics and put a dome over Oooooga City. Of course this meant cutting down some of the higher structures such as the Statue of Liberty. (Charlton Heston stopped by for a visit to Oooooga City some time later and was visibly upset by the whole thing.) Even without the dome it is likely that the OG would have demolished the Empire State Building since it had become a symbol of anti-simianism. The OG invited Jessica Lange to attend the Empire State Building demolition ceremony but she politely declined saying she was afraid “she might get too carried away with the whole thing”. And the city’s nickname, the big banana, isn’t entirely inappropriate since the dome over Oooooga City resembles a giant banana. The dome also allows for a controlled climate that supports the cultivation of small banana plantations.”
You can see more of the book by going to the following web site, searching for The Bureau of Resurrection, and then using Amazon’s search inside this book feature:
amazon.com
